Sports Notes, 3/18/07

-- That silence you’re hearing is the sound of all the points Illinois has still scored since the 4:28 mark Friday night.

-- What I’m about to say, I mean purely in the figurative sense, and I do feel that I have to clarify with this team: The best way to describe what happened Friday night is that Illinois was cruising along the highway, and then fell asleep at the wheel.

-- The worst part about all of this is, now I have to turn around and root for Virginia Tech today, because everybody else in my pool has SIU in the Sweet 16 and I drank enough Kool-Aid to put the Illini there.

-- How’d you like to be the guy whose job it is to try to make Tank Johnson his bitch?

-- “Excuse me, Mr. Tank? Is there any way that you could … you know … sort of, remove your trousers and assume the position?” Gulp.

-- I am the CEO of Kevin Schweitzer. But then again, nobody else really wants the job, and even I sometimes daydream of outsourcing and going for CEO of Doughnuts.

-- Hey, Scott Pollard: Do a book sometime. You might have something interesting to say.

-- Michigan finally gave up on its nice-guy coach. Do you think it was something I said?

-- As terrible as the Blackhawks have been once again this season, at least we can say that they’re beating the teams they’re supposed to. Unfortunately, that list starts and ends with the Los Angeles Kings.